Running a first session

The first session has a different job from every session after it. Its job is to establish that the conversation is safe, that it has a shape, and that it is about the lead rather than about their organisation. Almost all of that is set in the first ten minutes.

A structure for the hour

1. Set the frame, briefly. Say what the session is for, that it is confidential, and that you have no stake in what they decide.
2. Ask what brought them. Then stay quiet for longer than is comfortable.
3. Move to the goal question early, even if the answer is rough. A rough goal gives the rest of the hour something to work against.
4. Spend the bulk of the time on reality and options, and reserve the last ten minutes.
5. Close with one action and one signal. Write both down and read them back.

Two mistakes to avoid

The first is solving. When a lead describes a problem you have met before, the pull to hand over your solution is strong and it ends the coaching. The second is drifting into technical discussion because it is the shared and comfortable territory. Both are recoverable if you notice them; name what happened and go back to the goal.

Closing the first session

Ask what was useful and what was not. Early on that feedback is more valuable than anything else in the hour, and asking for it sets the expectation that the arrangement itself can be discussed.