---
title: "The GROW model, stage by stage"
url: https://techleadcoaching.com/guides/coaches/model
description: "The four stages, the question each one asks, and the failure each one has."
---

# The GROW model, stage by stage

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/guides/coaches · 18 March 2019

GROW is a widely used coaching structure that moves a conversation through four stages in order. Its value is not novelty; it is that it gives both people a shared map, so that a session which has stalled can be located rather than merely felt.

*The four GROW stages and what each one is for*

| Stage | The question it asks | How it typically fails |
|---|---|---|
| Goal | What do you want to be different by the next session? | The goal is really a project milestone, so the session becomes a status report. |
| Reality | What is actually happening, and what have you already tried? | The account stays abstract; nothing concrete is ever described. |
| Options | What could you do, including the options you have discounted? | Two options are generated and one is chosen out of politeness. |
| Way forward | What will you do first, and what would tell you it worked? | An intention is agreed with no first step and no signal. |

## Working the stages in order

The order matters more than the labels. Options generated before reality has been described honestly tend to be options for a problem that is not the one in the room. If the conversation jumps ahead, it is usually a sign that reality is uncomfortable, and going back is the useful move.

## When to leave the model

Occasionally a lead arrives with something that needs to be said before anything can be structured. Let that happen. The model is there to stop a session wandering, not to override the person in front of you; return to it once the air has cleared.

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